Bharat Rakshak

Time to party (again) Having given up on The Great Khan, the powers-that–be are planning to launch yet another party (groan). This one is meant to contain hefty people from amongst those who have Sinned — the highly strung ZM, the old war-horse Mush himself, the ubiquitous P of P etc. And from the Punjab, the Chaudhry Duo and some other leftovers. Will “they” ever learn?

Myth unravelled The recent shocking story of a class 8 teenage student’s gang rape at a seedy hotel in Lahore is not as straightforward as it seems. Our mole reports that the girl arranged to meet her boyfriend, a young man connected to the ruling party, at the hotel for a tryst and while there, the couple had an argument, after which there was a heated exchange of words followed by blows. Hearing the commotion, a group of revellers in the adjoining room came out into the corridor, whereupon the young girl also came out of her room. Her boyfriend, meanwhile, called the girl’s uncle and asked him to come to the designated room in the same hotel to fetch his niece. He then left the hotel, leaving the girl to await her family. Once the family had gathered, they decided to call the police. The latter was told that the girl’s friend had brought her to the hotel on false pretences, drugged and raped her. They then added another twist to the tale — the revellers next door, engaged in their own colourful “mujra” party, assaulted the girl at her friend’s behest. The family stuck to this story, the girl’s boyfriend having fled. The revellers were detained and the myth only unravelled when the DNA results came in. The tests proved that the couple had been engaged in a consenting relationship, and that there was no evidence of any extraneous encounters. Nonetheless, the girl is a minor and an offence had been committed. But since the DNA results came in, the girl’s family have showed an unwillingness to pursue the matter

Chinmayanand wrote:I wish 72 hooris for all baki mards in al 2016.

Lalmohan wrote:i always wonderings iph lal topi (of mijjile) is caused by ghazwa-e-behind or naat?

It may be old news, but one that reflects staggering official incompetence. The original NABBER, as designated in the Mush era, signed an an asset recovery agreement with Broadsheet, an Isle of Mann company, way back in 2000. The company was supposed to help Pakistan recover stolen wealth from abroad. In fact, the agreement was to trace, locate & recover. So far so good.

But here’s the best part: Broadsheet had been in existence for 40 days and had a capital stock of £200, yes two hundred pounds only! The agreement was that NAB would only pay 20% of any recovery made by Broadsheet. As it transpired, the Government of Pakistan paid them $1.5 million out of the $7.5 million paid by ex-Navy Chief Admiral Mansur ul Haq as part of his plea bargain. The government went on to rescind the agreement in 2003, Broadsheet has now sued the government, and the matter has gone to the International Arbitration Council. For an explanation of this monumental bungling, please see the next item.

How it all began

Once there was a king who wanted to go on shikar. He called the royal weather forecaster and asked for the weather forecast. The weatherman said no chance of rain. So the king went hunting. On the way he met a farmer on his donkey. The farmer said, “Your Majesty, please return to the palace because it’s about to rain”. The king said: “the palace meteorologist is an educated, experienced professional, whom I pay high wages. He gave me a different forecast. He says no rain, so I’ll carry on”. But a short time later a torrential rain began. The King was soaked, and furious, he returned to the palace and sacked the professional. Then he summoned the farmer and offered him the job of royal forecaster. The farmer said, “Your Majesty, I don’t know anything about forecasting. I get my information from my donkey. If I see my donkey’s ears drooping, it means that it will rain.”

So the king hired the donkey.

And thus began the practice of hiring dumb asses to work in the government and occupy its highest positions. This practice continues to date

GunterH wrote:"Sharif! Why are you so shy when i gently touch you here?"

The Pentagon spent millions of dollars importing nine rare Italian goats to Afghanistan in a bid to boost the local cashmere industry, it has emerged. The goats went missing, presumed eaten, and the $6m (£4.2m) project was never completed, a US government investigator has concluded.

vishvak wrote:

Now total TFTA mard pilots can ride the cheeni ghoda by pulling headcollar by the left hand and whipping like Saudis with right hands.

gandharva wrote:WTF!! Who does this kind of $hit?

http://www.liveleak.com/view?i=3eb_1454680117

#NSFW

Falijee wrote:After ]Halal Food In Pakiland , It Is Halal Cosmetics Now

. . . He said besides halal food, government will also ensure halal cosmetics (haram ingredients in the non halal products ?)in the country.

SSridhar wrote:Alcohol, for example. Many Middle Eastern countries do so. I am surprised that Pakistan was not following such a practice so far.